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On personality and interpersonal relationships

Hui-Jane Su

Do you always sigh with despair and think it difficult to act based on complicated interpersonal relationships? Before regrets, why not learn to be a self-satisfied and popular person?

Based on research, the personality traits which one displays are the factors that influence his/her interpersonal relationships. Good personality traits not only can improve interpersonal relationships, but also can increase personal attraction, and make you a cute person to love. Why not try hard to develop the following personality traits to make people like you more?


According to Anderson(1968), among all personality traits, sincerity is the most important key to making people like you. People prefer those who are sincere, rather than calculated, crafty and cunning; therefore, to have wonderful interpersonal relationships, we have to treat others with our hearts. Do not do unto others as you do not like them to do to you. To feel for others is the basic principle to make friendships endurable.


Among complicated interpersonal relationships, a person with a smiling face along with a decent and kind attitude will be more approachable than one with no facial expressions as well as a cold and detached attitude. According to Folkes & Sears (1977), one with elated thoughts and perspectives of looking at people will show more warmth to others. When feeling people we meet are nice, issues we talk about are interesting, things we do are meaningful, and we will be highly interested in showing our warmth to others. Hence, others will be glad to make friends with us.


Usually, people appreciate those who are smart, competent, and wise. Competent people bring us more benefits because they probably help us out, brainstorm new ideas and make life much more interesting and easier. Owing to “social exchange theory,” the more abilities one has the more values he/she exchanges with others. Through mutual interactions, each individual makes a contribution to draw on the strength of each to offset the weakness of the other. If we try to learn from each other, we will find it easier to develop our interpersonal relationships.

Physical attractiveness

Some research indicates that under the same conditions, a physically attractive person is more welcomed than one with a less attractive appearance. Though beauty is only skin deep and inner beauty should be more valued than outside appearance, yet research confirms that an attractive person still gains more positive responses from others due to the influence of stereotypical beauty. With more and more interpersonal interactions, people start to get to know each other more; as a result, inner personalities will have a remarkable influence on interpersonal relationships. However, we cannot deny that beauty still makes a favorable impression. To pursue external and inner beauty appropriately, therefore, also represents the respect that you show towards others and yourself.

Pleasant personality

In addition to sincerity, warmth, competence as well as physical attractiveness, people like those who are kind-hearted, humorous, outgoing, responsible, and willing to help and care about others. While getting along with those whose pleasant or agreeable personality traits make your life feel hopeful, with those who tend to be anxious, worried, negative, and insecure you feel moody and less motivated to make them your friends. As a result, cultivating positive, pleasant, or agreeable personality traits is also a key element in interpersonal relationships.

Building and maintaining amicable relationships with others helps you stay positive and confident toward the future. If one tries hard to be a better and more productive person, people will have favorable impressions of him/her in return. Then he/she accomplishes the purpose desired, creating more opportunities and a sense of security for him/herself. Let’s develop those wonderful personality traits discussed above! With a little bit of change and learning, we will immerse ourselves in the joy of wonderful interpersonal relationships!

Chen, J.M.,& Zhong, S.J. (1996). Interpersonal relationships. Taipei: Youth Cultural.